These days, this week has been a roller coaster of stress and sleep deprivation and complete laziness. There's been no real balance, no in-between... I've been incredibly busy with my Italian Cinema Studies internship, which I'll post about soon, I hope. Unfortunately, this has led me to be lazy... and laziness led me to unhealthiness. It makes me a little sad, that, you know, it's not easy to eat the foods you need, the things that will benefit you most. It's like a chore that takes more effort (worth it), but when I barely have time to eat a meal at all let alone one that's nutritious for me, I suffer. My body suffers and my brain suffers, too. When I get to the point where I'll eat anything just to have something in my stomach, telling my body: Do not shut down. Here's something to sustain you! But it's all a trick, an illusion of sustenance. I don't know where that beef in the phad thai came from, or who picked the veggies in my Mediterranean panino. Moreover, I haven't had a fresh, raw meal in awhile and eating so much cooked food only takes more energy from my body for it to digest everything and for some measly amount of protein or whatever nutrients are left in those sauteed vegetables. So sometimes I have to step back, take a moment and tell myself: Don't put that into your body, you're better off without it! Don't get me wrong, I can't eat healthy-healthy all the time. Honestly, I don't always want to. But when I can, I should care where exactly my food comes from because too many of us just don't. "Super Size Me" came out in 2004, what's really changed in 6 years except those golden arches have been painted green, but underneath they are still gold, no? What's really changed? And why is it fairly difficult for individuals to make these changes?

Sometimes, I just need to buck up and watch Food, Inc. again as painly as it is to remind myself that there's a reason why I eat the things I do. Sometimes, I have to call my inner-Michael Pollan and say to myself, "I'm in a omnivore's dilemma, but I can make it work!" Okay, so I threw some Ted Gunn in there.



Sometimes, (actually always) I have to read me some Food Politics. Stay inspired, remain motivated, and not succumb to laziness.

Earlier last week, I was on the phone with my mom and I asked her if we could have an organic turkey for Thanksgiving this year. She agreed, I mean she was pretty for it, which I expected. What I didn't expect was a phone call from her later, yelling - out of nowhere - about how she's not paying for a $75 turkey. First of all, I told her I didn't expect to and I didn't even know how much they cost. But I let her know that if it's not organic then I probably am not going to eat it. Then she called me a brat, a BRAT! Are you serious? I know this is typical mother-daughter quarreling, but as I thought a bit more about it I realized that she immediately reacted to my choice to be more sustainable and healthy as "bratty" because it's harder to feed me and easier to just buy the regular ol' turkey farm turkeys that are, of course, less expensive. It's not about "brattiness" but norms in food and standards of where food originates. I didn't want to be a "brat" but a conscious eater during this big family meal. Thanksgiving is about the harvest. The harvesting of autumnal foods and gathering to appreciate what the earth gave us. I don't want to treat it this year as a holiday to gorge myself on food that came from only factories know where... I didn't want to embrace the idea that if it's there I'll eat it, what a lazy attitude! I wanna enjoy myself, of course I do, and not be the food-police, but if I don't make changes how can I really enjoy that meal?

trips to safeway

are fun with my roommate, ilysia.
the johnny rockets was no good to me. but i love how embarrassing ilysia is. it makes safeway trips bearable. who else would ask me questions like,

This is a weird question but, would you ever consider donating your eggs? Like the give hundreds of dollars per egg.

What. the hell? haha. after discussing dibsing of your eggs for insurance sake, of course i quip back,

that's like committing abortion. 150,000 times!

its ok, ilys, i have my moments. like when i speak jibberjabber about the reader board thats apparently fascinating and you respond with, "what just came out your mouth?" Me: "I don't know, spit........... Wait. What are you asking me? Ok, for the record normal humans ask, "what did you just say" versus "what came out of your mouth." so yeah. fuck you.

Steven's Court K 304 - Thanksgiving Dinner. Menu? amazingness. jello cake? yes, please. pumpkin cookies? uh check. the shits later? most likely.